Courage For Success

Feeling Great! Newsletter

#1 For Online Counseling & Life Coaching


I received an email from an old client the other day. I am always tickled to hear from my ex-clients. Let's call him Don to protect his privacy. Don initially came to see me a couple of years ago.

Here was his history in a nutshell. He was in his late 30's, lived with his mother and his two children. He was never married, and the mother of his two children was in prison at the time we met. He was unemployed and collecting Social Security and Disability Benefits. 

He had what he called a "love-hate" relationship with his mother and this relationship had been this way for many years. His children had a basketful of issues, including poor grades, drug abuse, truancy, legal problems and authority issues.

Don himself struggled with severe depression, chronic pain issues and on-again off-again drug abuse issues himself. He had terrible self-pity. He felt dumped on by the world. He felt like a victim!

There's grave danger in being a victim, even when you HAVE BEEN VICTIMIZED. You see, victims have no power. And since they have no power, as Don believed, they feel there's no hope for change, except if someone comes along and saves them from their circumstances.

I am a very visual person and by the second session I had a powerful visualization of Don's circumstance. I shared it with him. It went something like this...

"You are in a simple boat, adrift in the ocean. 
There is no engine. The oars have been long lost. 
In the boat with you is your mother. The fog is so dense that you can only see the outer rim of the boat edges and that's all. You're starving for 
food, for nourishment. You've called out for help. 
I am standing on the shoreline. You don't know me from Adam. I have heard your call for help and I am responding. I'm yelling out to you in the most serious manner, that the current is pulling you away from shore, from solid ground. In order to get to solid ground you have to trust me. Don says, what must I do? You have to jump from the boat into the fog and swim towards the sound of my voice, towards freedom. His mother overhears the conversation. She laughs at him and reminds him the boat is the ONLY safe place to be. They've lived there most of their lives. Don finally becomes desperate and angry enough about his situation that he dives overboard and begins swimming towards shore. Behind him his mother cackles like an old hen who knows her young will be climbing back into the boat very soon. I'm still yelling from the shoreline. Don hesitates, grows weary... my voice is blurred out by the waves crashing at him. Ironically, he can still hear his mother loud and clear. He nearly drowns, but makes it back to the boat, climbs in and collapses in exhaustion. Of course, you know what his mother says, right? Yes, you know... "I told you so!"

That was Don's struggle when he met me. Upon our meeting, he didn't magically grow wings and fly to shore. Lasting change rarely works that way. He made many attempts to leave the boat and ended right smack back inside of it.

But, I planted a seed. This seed is the most powerful seed any of you can nurture, care for and grow. It's the power of a "DECISION." You have the power to make a DECISION. Don's opinion of what or who was holding him back was his mother and an assortment of other things. What's yours? Is it depression that's holding you back? Is it anxiety? Is it your beliefs about your abilities? Is your money beliefs in your way?

Don decided to take his future success into his own hands. He decided to take off his VICTIM hat and cast it away. Don is now living on his own. He's off welfare and employed full time in a business he loves. He has two powerful certifications in information technology and is currently double-majoring in Business and Cisco Technologies. All from the power of a decision.

From his last email I'll simply quote his final line to me:


"I am still swimming for that shore and getting closer each and every day."

What will your decision be?


Dave Turo-Shields
Veteran Psychotherapist
Life Coach

Your Question Please?

What is the HOTTEST question you would love to have the answer to?  Email it to me and receive a fre-e professional therapist coach response, either in this newsletter or on my website.

Your HOT Question!

Coaches Corner

I rarely promote other coaches, but I would be doing you a disservice if I didn't introduce you to my mentor in coaching, Stuart Lichtman.  Before I met Stuart I was well into my own recovery from depression.  I had a happy and successful life and career.  Reading and implementing Stuart's ebook blew my doors off.  I realized I was living a fraction of my potential.  Since then, I have been flying mach II with my hair on fire.  And Stuart's been there every step of the way with powerful wisdom, guidance and support.  

The irony?  Three trusted friends recommended his ebook before I finally purchased it.  I nearly made a horrible mistake, but I was annoyed at the title and after three visits I still had not purchased it.  In fact, I still believe the title's awful!  I've told Stuart this. ;-)

However, I am ever so grateful I took the plunge.   On my 4th visit to the site I bought the book.   What's inside the cover is transforming my life.  As I write this I feel a tinge of fear that I almost turned away from such an incredible, simple, do-able and life transforming process. 

Please understand, I am likely the most well-read self-help authority you will come across.  If my house burned down today, it would take me years to grieve the treasury of books on spirituality and self-help that I have amassed.

This is one book I highly recommend.  You won't want to miss it


As the old saying goes --

"Don't Judge A Book By It's Cover."

This is the most powerful self-help book I've ever laid hands on but you've got to see the cover and title to know just how painful it was for me to purchase.

Take a look for yourself


Are You Subscribed Yet?

If Feeling Great! was forwarded to you I know you've enjoyed it, but why not sign up for your own subscription!  You're missing out on a valuable fre-e gift to subscribers entitled The Blues Busters Course.  It's a mini-course delivered by email on how to knock out the blues!

Subscribe by visiting my website.  Subscribe boxes are on nearly every page.

Overcoming Depression
Life Coaching

Know Someone Who's Hurting?
Pass Along This Newsletter

Copyright 1998-2003 CounselingPros, Inc.