Feeling Great! Newsletter

Online Counseling, 
Life Coaching and 
Phone Counseling

Self Confidence 
by Jim Sullivan

As a hypnotherapist I specialise in helping people to develop confidence and self esteem. But what is confidence? I find a great deal of misunderstanding among my clients; many tell me that they want to become more confident “but not too confident”, as if confidence can be dangerous in large quantities.

Many people, it seems, associate brashness and arrogance with confidence. Indeed, arrogant people may be strong in some dimensions of confidence, but they are seriously deficient in others. Truly confident people are aware of their own emotional state, and in tune with the emotions of others. True self confidence leads to feelings of relaxation in a wide range of situations. Such relaxation feeds the individual’s confidence, setting up a virtuous circle.

In order to understand self confidence we have to consider it as a multi-dimensional quality. Your confidence at any specific moment is a complex blend of factors, including social confidence, physical presence, peer independence, stage presence and physical presence. Everybody has their own, distinctive, profile of confidence.
So the bullying, ‘alpha male’ business leader who struts around the office may indeed be strong in physical presence and stage presence, but may lack confidence in the value of their opinions, and may indeed find it difficult to stay true to their core values and beliefs.

This is at the heart of real confidence : the ability to remain true to those values which you hold dear. A balanced, self-confident person is the same in any company. The presence of high status individuals, or low status individuals, does not significantly change their responses or outward displays. A truly self confident person knows what they believe and can remain comfortable expressing their beliefs regardless of the prevailing fashion.

Is this you? Do you feel comfortable expressing yourself in a group, with people from all strata of society? We all fall short of the ideal, in this as in other aspects of our lives, but it is comforting to know that self confidence can be developed and nurtured.

Many thousands of people have taken the Confidence Club questionnaire, which profiles a person’s strengths and weaknesses against 5 different dimensions of confidence. The questionnaire can be found here : http://www.confidenceclub.net/process/questionnaire.php

If you have ever found yourself wondering why your confidence seems to desert you in certain circumstances, take the questionnaire and find out precisely where your strengths and weaknesses lie. You may be surprised by what you can learn about yourself.

About the Author

Jim Sullivan is a hypnotherapist and confidence coach. He may be contacted via Confidence Club : www.confidenceclub.net

Dave Turo-Shields (email)
Veteran Psychotherapist, Trainer & Life Coach

Sign up for this newsletter by visiting either site above.

Join The Blog

Add to the  Hope & Success Blog! Or visit for inspirational stories.

Send Your Success Snippet

Visit the Blog


"Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.."

  ~ Lao Tzu


Professional Life Coaching

If you have a good relationship and you'd like to take your relationship to an extraordinary level, give me a call.  I will be happy to spend time to teach you what relationship coaching is and show you how you can achieve a wonderful balance in your relationship.  

Dave Turo-Shields
Professional Life Coach


Professional Support Options

Email Consults - $49.95 each or $119.88 for three. 

Depression Program - $59.95
Reduced Price! Was $99.95

Relationship Coaching - FREE complimentary session by phone. 317-865-1674

Phone Counseling - $85.00 per 45 minutes.

Get Help Now

Ask A Question About Services

Pass Along This Newsletter

Copyright 1998-2005CounselingPros, Inc